When you and your mum meet at the door of your house at 1 a.m. and you both start to shovel snow and talk about sexual innuendos, you know you've had a nice evening and/or definitely enough booze!
At least that what happened to me last week. Yeah, it's that snowy in March in Germany... I had the smaller shovel and I started to make jokes about how "things that aren't big and wide enough don't really do the job" and she kind of joined in. I hope she doesn't remember it :x
This incident made me think of some of the weird things that usually only occur when you're intoxicated. And although I've been anti-alcohol until my 18th birthday (let's just take this as a starting point for my openness about drinking), I've experienced some pretty weird things while being either a bit drunk or totally wasted. Of course, I learned some valuable lessons from these nights, so let me share them with you!
1) Gain a lot of weight in order to tolerate more alcohol!
Being
an L and not an XS, you have the advantage of being able to tolerate
more alcohol. Quite handy, isn't it? And that is the ONLY reason why I
don't really try to lose weight *cough*
Despite my alcohol intolerance (which I got confirmed a few years ago due to a lack of a certain enzyme or so) I can handle more drinks than any of my 60kg-friends. PRAISE THE FAT!
2) You think you are smart and clever with your jokes? Think again!
Many people get tired when they're drunk, some get emotional and others get aggressive. I'm one of those people that gets more talkative when drunk. And even worse: I think I'm funny, too! :x I make uncreative puns and think they're the shit! And in my head, everybody's clapping for my amazing humor. I become Sassy McSasspants with the wit of a thousand comedians and I bring my inner Honey Boo Boo child to life!
3) Drinking alone is not a bad thing - unless you combine it with antidepressants :/
Sometimes, you just need a bit of red wine to calm yourself down after a hard day. And that's totally fine! But when you visit a friend and decide to try something out before leaving with some booze left in the bottle that you're taking with you, it can get a little out of hand... Don't get me wrong! I don't take antidepressants! But one night, I foolishly thought that taking just ONE pill would not make a difference, because my intoxicated mind thought "It's only a placebo, this won't do any harm!" ... So I swallowed the pill at a friend's house with some alcoholic beverage and let's just say: It escalated quickly...
I can only remember waking up next to the staff of a train in a different state in Germany, feeling like somebody exchanged my brain with cotton candy and as high as a kite. Luckily, I somehow made it home without any difficulties. Let this be a lesson to you: Don't combine two different kinds of drugs (even if you think it's "only a placebo") !!!
4) Drink a lot (and I mean A LOT) of water!
Nothing's worse than a bad hangover on the morning after. Well, there might be several things that are (What is this racoon doing in my bed?), but for the sake of this post, it's the worst that can happen to you. One thing you can do to lessen the chance of a mind-blowing headache is drink water. Two liters before going to bed should do the trick. You might have a bladder that is on the verge of exploding when waking up, but even that is better than wasting a whole day because of feeling meh.
Drink with responsibility, people! Have fun, but know your limits ;)
I just thought I'd share my experiences with you. Now that this is done, let's get to my current favorite tracks!
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~music time~
The White Panda - Firefly
(A nice mashup using Ellie Goulding's 'Anything could happen', Lumineers' 'Ho Hey' and other samples)
Monitor 66 - Follow You
Bastille - Overjoyed
Aluna George - I Wanna Be Like You (Jungle Book Cover)
Andy Bull - Keep On Running
Deadmau5 & Imogen Heap - Telemiscommunication
(My favorite of the bunch. Plus, the video is insanely good.)
I hope you've enjoyed these tracks and that you won't take me as an example when it comes to alcohol ;)
Greetings
~maximiwax'*
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