Tiny Hand

2015/02/15

Snow Why-not?!

I thought about ideas for a new blog post since my former a-new-blog-post-every-other-week-plan didn't work out as well as I had hoped. As you might've noticed, I'm a lazy fuck when it comes to updating this pure GEM of a blog. I consistently find new music, but my writer's block is as annoying as volcano zits on picture day. A few days ago, however, I listened to one of Kimbra's newest effusions of her crazy, new-pop mind, "I'm Wishing", a cover of the Disney classic from the movie 'Snow White'.
Not only is it a really good, vamped-up and sensual version of the forgotten musical treasure, it also helped me with my creative embargo. Immediately, the diffuse visions I had in my head took shape and developed around the Snow White theme. And I thought to myself, "Snow White? Snow Why-NOT?!" [get it? haha very laugh much funny]

I may or may not have mentioned in the last post that I started working in a clothing store in my city. Apart from some minor mishaps, everything went alright so far and I'm glad that I can earn some money on the side. My co-workers are nice, too, buuuuuuuut...
And this is where I start with something that I've noticed several times already. A situation so weird to be in, you don't know whether to cry, to politely smile or to punch someone.

Just to be clear, I was feeling a bit under the weather, lately, including a few days of sickness. But overall, I'm as healthy as it gets, rosy cheeks and all! One day, a friend of mine invited me to her birthday party, but unfortunately, I had to work 'til 8 p.m.. I wanted to arrive at my friend's party on time or maybe just a few minutes late, so I feigned to be sick. I held my stomach, asked for a headache pill and went to the toilet quite often. It worked! They thought I was super ill and said that the shop wouldn't be that busy atm and that I could go home and lay down. Because - and here it comes! - "You look really sick. Very pale, too. I'm worried for you! Get some rest and let us know if you are able to work in a few days, Okay?"
I was feeling rather fine at that moment and they said I was looking like death himself!
I composed myself and kept acting like the sick person they thought I was. But on the inside I was dissappointed, hurt and - I don't know why - angry. They just stepped on my self-esteem, gave it a kick in the side, spitted on it and said farewell. Throughout my whole shift, I thought I was engaging, radiating and appealing to the customers. And now my colleagues basically told me that I had a huge booger of uglyness all over my face the whole time! I didn't know I looked like a corpse until they told me so...

I wonder how Snow White would've reacted if the dwarfs made such comments about her appearance when she was in that glass coffin...
Yep, like that...
Here's a tip: A sick person doesn't want to know how sick he or she looks. Not cute.

Aside from my work, I haven't been very busy the last few months. The worst part about procrastinating - which I now realise is a VERY common concept in my blog posts - is that the worries and increasing pressure of actually doing the thing paralyze you even more, making you unable to do the thing beyond your initial paralysis.
Oh, I should do the thing. Nah, I'll just watch some more videos and eventually do it.
Hey, some hours have passed. Should I do the thing now? Yes I should. Will I do it? Hm, maybe after a bit more binge-watching of my favorite show.
Oh fuck, I really should do the thing. It's too late to not do it. But I don't have enough time. Or the drive. I can't do the thing now, anymore. Byebye, thing. Someone else must do you now, I guess...

The dwarfs in the Snow White story were very busy little bees. They didn't know why they worked in those diamond mines, but they did it anyway. If I were a dwarf, I'd be both Sleepy and Dopey. Lazy and stupid. But even these little fellas did their work! Imagine the dwarf gang with a really lazy member:
You get 500 valueless points if you get that reference!
Checking your tumblr, looking for some updates on your favorite OTP, answering your emails, chatting with strangers, watching How-Tos and Let's Plays on youtube and keeping up with current pop-culture phenomena is extremely time consuming! And, for me at least, essential for my well-being and a carefree mind in this dark and twisted world we live in! I guess my fellow dwarfs would either kick me out of their cottage, force me to do my work against my will or just let me be the worthless dwarf turd that I am, alone in my filthy bed next to their tidy, little row of 7 perfectly-made beds.
I bet those suckers bribed the birds and Bambi's mother to make the beds for them. Fucking little shits...

And because yesterday was Valentine's Day and the fact that I had (or have) a Valentine - or is it a "Valentino"? And if so, does he come with a designer bag without me knowing? - I had to include the prince.
Get ready for some kitschy, heart-eyed rapture.
Think about this: In the movie, the prince, Florian, kissed a corpse. At least he thought Snow White was dead when he pressed his lips against hers. How romantic and, at the same time, disgusting is that? I mean, yeah, I guess he heard about her soft, white-as-snow skin, but in the end she must've looked as sick and pale as I OBVIOUSLY did at work! (Thanks again, co-workers!)
He instantly fell in love with her beauty and after the incident, they married and lifed happily ever afterblahblah. You only get this kind of ending in a fairytale...
And that's where you're wrong! My dude, tall, strong, masculine, warm-hearted and ingenious, did basically the same thing. Corpse-y Max seems to have enchanted this attractive specimen. Don't ask me how I did it, but something must've worked. And I know how I look in the morning. I know how annoying I can get, I know how silly I tend to be, how many things I use to forget, all my bad habits and everything that should repel every human being with a bit of intellect and some standards. But here we are, two as one, buddies with feelings, cuddle partners and much more. It's a fairytale in itself, really.

I know how disgusted you are now, which is why I want to distract you from all the cheesyness with a 20-track playlist of my favorite tracks from December, January and February (thus far).
Enjoy! (And please share it [meaning the blog post and/or the playlist]! Some support would be appreciated, goddammit!! :P)
Happy Not-Valentine's Day!
Treat. Yo. Self!
(Another 500 points if you get the reference again)

2014/11/30

Xmas-imiwax and Life Choices

'Tis the season. Take a look out of your window and what do you see? Frantic faces, cheesy Christmas decorations and lights all over the place. And Xmas still almost a month away!

Of course, Xmas is the holiday of love ...*yuck*... Some might say it's the holiday of gifts and the obligatory cramp of finding and buying the right gifts without going bankrupt. I say, it's the holiday of awkward and tedious conversations with relatives and burning questions about your life.

So what are you up to?
How's school/studying/work doing?
Found a job yet?

These questions put an anime-like drop of sweat on my forehead. Life doesn't put enought pressure on you, oh no, there have to be people who put you into a state of irritation and confusion with their gnawing questions all of the time, especially on birthdays, Xmas and other celebrations! And no matter how often you see these people or how often you get these question, THEY ALWAYS COME BACK! Just for ONE Christmas season, I want to experience inner peace and non-existant scrutiny.

And if you're like me - a 20-something; somewhere between studying, finding a job and sleeping; and a master of constant procrastination - you start to ask yourself the same question: What am I doing with my life?

I just got my Bachelor's degree and continue to visit some courses, but overall, I'm an unemployed, lazy bastard like the ones "our kind" tends to make fun of. The problem is, I don't really know what comes next.
It's as if life was a jungle. And you're Tarzan. Well, I'm Tarzan, I mean look at dat bod'! You're ... Jane? One of the monkeys? Okay, you can be Tarzan, too... Anyway, you're Tarzan and the purpose of your life is to jump from liana to liana to get to the destination of your choice. Luckily, life gives you a selection of several lianas right after the other.
"Already able to talk and not shit your pants? Here, have a grade school liana! Done with 1+1 and all that stuff? Nice, what about these high school lianas? Wow, Mr./Ms. graduate is in da houze! Great, now here are a few options to choose from: maybe a university or some scholarships in between? Nice choice! Oh, what do we have here, you got a degree now, huh? Weeeeeell... Umm... Yeah. I'm out. Good luck, kiddo!"
And you don't wanna know where you'll find yourself when falling to the ground...

I could hang on to my current liana. I could cling on to my degree and try to jump to the big Master's tree. But right now, that tree is of no interest for me, yet. I WANT to comb through the jungle, see what's out there, try my best not to fall down.

I've sent out several applications, but the only positive response I received came from a rather uncommon career field. "Barrel-organ Klaus" contacted me and asked, if I wanted to be Santa this Christmas. Visiting families' homes, acting like the big, bearded, old fairytale man and warming children's hearts.

Guys... if you're reading this, you might as well know the other blog posts and my opinion about these crazy, little mofos. Children are the worst. And this Mr. Klaus wants ME to be their entertainer this year?
So yeah, I'm Santa Claus, signed a contract and all... I mean, I get paid for it, so why not, right?

It seems like I have to visit 4-5 families on Christmas Eve. I WILL have difficulties not to drown myself in gl├╝hwein right before the meetings (the contract states that I am not allowed to work under the influence. urgh), I WILL have difficulties to stay in character and I WILL have difficulties not to crush some children's dreams.
Something in me really wants to, though...
Oh, just the thought of angry parents, crying boys and girls, a ruined holiday and several years of costly therapy brings a smile to my face :)
What a shame that I have to act all normal and orderly to get the money... Oh well. Maybe some other time...


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~music time~

Instead of torturing you with a Christmas playlist, I decided to make another compilation. A selection of my favorite tracks from, well, September until November. I know I'm a shitty blogger when it comes to monthly blog posts, but hey, the Maximimixes are all the better! ;) It got some Indie Rock, some remixes, psychedelic alternative Pop and a handful of electronic tracks, hope you like it!