Tiny Hand


Snow Why-not?!

I thought about ideas for a new blog post since my former a-new-blog-post-every-other-week-plan didn't work out as well as I had hoped. As you might've noticed, I'm a lazy fuck when it comes to updating this pure GEM of a blog. I consistently find new music, but my writer's block is as annoying as volcano zits on picture day. A few days ago, however, I listened to one of Kimbra's newest effusions of her crazy, new-pop mind, "I'm Wishing", a cover of the Disney classic from the movie 'Snow White'.
Not only is it a really good, vamped-up and sensual version of the forgotten musical treasure, it also helped me with my creative embargo. Immediately, the diffuse visions I had in my head took shape and developed around the Snow White theme. And I thought to myself, "Snow White? Snow Why-NOT?!" [get it? haha very laugh much funny]

I may or may not have mentioned in the last post that I started working in a clothing store in my city. Apart from some minor mishaps, everything went alright so far and I'm glad that I can earn some money on the side. My co-workers are nice, too, buuuuuuuut...
And this is where I start with something that I've noticed several times already. A situation so weird to be in, you don't know whether to cry, to politely smile or to punch someone.

Just to be clear, I was feeling a bit under the weather, lately, including a few days of sickness. But overall, I'm as healthy as it gets, rosy cheeks and all! One day, a friend of mine invited me to her birthday party, but unfortunately, I had to work 'til 8 p.m.. I wanted to arrive at my friend's party on time or maybe just a few minutes late, so I feigned to be sick. I held my stomach, asked for a headache pill and went to the toilet quite often. It worked! They thought I was super ill and said that the shop wouldn't be that busy atm and that I could go home and lay down. Because - and here it comes! - "You look really sick. Very pale, too. I'm worried for you! Get some rest and let us know if you are able to work in a few days, Okay?"
I was feeling rather fine at that moment and they said I was looking like death himself!
I composed myself and kept acting like the sick person they thought I was. But on the inside I was dissappointed, hurt and - I don't know why - angry. They just stepped on my self-esteem, gave it a kick in the side, spitted on it and said farewell. Throughout my whole shift, I thought I was engaging, radiating and appealing to the customers. And now my colleagues basically told me that I had a huge booger of uglyness all over my face the whole time! I didn't know I looked like a corpse until they told me so...

I wonder how Snow White would've reacted if the dwarfs made such comments about her appearance when she was in that glass coffin...
Yep, like that...
Here's a tip: A sick person doesn't want to know how sick he or she looks. Not cute.

Aside from my work, I haven't been very busy the last few months. The worst part about procrastinating - which I now realise is a VERY common concept in my blog posts - is that the worries and increasing pressure of actually doing the thing paralyze you even more, making you unable to do the thing beyond your initial paralysis.
Oh, I should do the thing. Nah, I'll just watch some more videos and eventually do it.
Hey, some hours have passed. Should I do the thing now? Yes I should. Will I do it? Hm, maybe after a bit more binge-watching of my favorite show.
Oh fuck, I really should do the thing. It's too late to not do it. But I don't have enough time. Or the drive. I can't do the thing now, anymore. Byebye, thing. Someone else must do you now, I guess...

The dwarfs in the Snow White story were very busy little bees. They didn't know why they worked in those diamond mines, but they did it anyway. If I were a dwarf, I'd be both Sleepy and Dopey. Lazy and stupid. But even these little fellas did their work! Imagine the dwarf gang with a really lazy member:
You get 500 valueless points if you get that reference!
Checking your tumblr, looking for some updates on your favorite OTP, answering your emails, chatting with strangers, watching How-Tos and Let's Plays on youtube and keeping up with current pop-culture phenomena is extremely time consuming! And, for me at least, essential for my well-being and a carefree mind in this dark and twisted world we live in! I guess my fellow dwarfs would either kick me out of their cottage, force me to do my work against my will or just let me be the worthless dwarf turd that I am, alone in my filthy bed next to their tidy, little row of 7 perfectly-made beds.
I bet those suckers bribed the birds and Bambi's mother to make the beds for them. Fucking little shits...

And because yesterday was Valentine's Day and the fact that I had (or have) a Valentine - or is it a "Valentino"? And if so, does he come with a designer bag without me knowing? - I had to include the prince.
Get ready for some kitschy, heart-eyed rapture.
Think about this: In the movie, the prince, Florian, kissed a corpse. At least he thought Snow White was dead when he pressed his lips against hers. How romantic and, at the same time, disgusting is that? I mean, yeah, I guess he heard about her soft, white-as-snow skin, but in the end she must've looked as sick and pale as I OBVIOUSLY did at work! (Thanks again, co-workers!)
He instantly fell in love with her beauty and after the incident, they married and lifed happily ever afterblahblah. You only get this kind of ending in a fairytale...
And that's where you're wrong! My dude, tall, strong, masculine, warm-hearted and ingenious, did basically the same thing. Corpse-y Max seems to have enchanted this attractive specimen. Don't ask me how I did it, but something must've worked. And I know how I look in the morning. I know how annoying I can get, I know how silly I tend to be, how many things I use to forget, all my bad habits and everything that should repel every human being with a bit of intellect and some standards. But here we are, two as one, buddies with feelings, cuddle partners and much more. It's a fairytale in itself, really.

I know how disgusted you are now, which is why I want to distract you from all the cheesyness with a 20-track playlist of my favorite tracks from December, January and February (thus far).
Enjoy! (And please share it [meaning the blog post and/or the playlist]! Some support would be appreciated, goddammit!! :P)
Happy Not-Valentine's Day!
Treat. Yo. Self!
(Another 500 points if you get the reference again)

1 comment:

  1. God! You have no idea how happy I am for you!
    Sending hugs your way!