Ouch, that HURTS!

When I looked into the mirror the other day, I checked out all the scars I have and remembered how much pain I endured during the surgeries and afterwards. I don't even know how much there are anymore, because I keep missing 1 or 2 of them all the time.. Even though each scar is a different memory, they add up to a pile of flaws that lay on top of all the other flaws I have, which - again - brings my self-esteem to a new low-point. Damn you, beautiful male models and porn stars, for your perfect skin and your chiseled bodies!

The worst thing is that I can't do anything about it. These tiny, benign tumors keep coming back because of a gene defect, which basically means that every now and then I get a new one for my "collection". My body is more or less my worst enemy. It hates me and I often hate it back.

(more or less accurate..)

I feel like Chucky, the 'murderdoll'.
Good thing is that I can cope with pain quite well. I never cry (pain, songs, movies, etc) and I'm not whiny about the pain I feel. Most of the time.

There is one type of pain that I can't stand. Do you know these liiiiiiittle wounds on your hand or somewhere else that look as if everything's fine? And if you talk to a friend about it and show him or her what it's about, you'll hear "well, it doesn't look that bad"....BUT IT FREAKIN' HURTS! How come that a wound this small can hurt that bad??

And if you try to do something about it or get rid of it, it feels like this one scene in "Black Swan" where Nina, the ballerina (haha, that rhymes!^^) pulls the skin from her finger. Ouchies to the MAX!

Anyways... I still hope there is someone on this planet that can see past all my flaws. Unfortunately, gays are some of the most superficial people out there. But maybe there is some sort of ...scar-fetish??? *fingers crossed*

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~music time~

Florrie - Live A Little
I know that this song is pure pop, but somehow the trumpets make it kinda fresh. Plus, it reminds me of Wiley's video for Numbers In Action...

Black Light Dinner Party - Lift Away

Owlle - Ticky Ticky

MASHUP: ViC - Yelle on the World (Yelle vs The Soubert Singers)

 Findlay - Off&On

I hope you like my choice of tracks, again :)

And let this be a lesson to you: Don't let the media brainwash you! Perfection is boring, flaws bring character and uniqueness!

Greetings

~Maximiwax'*

"LOL" - the drinking game!

Can you see this tiny, little box at the end of the screen when you scroll down 'til the end? It says 'hates [...] the "word" lol'. And I can certainly say that this is one of the "words" that infuriate me to the point of inner uproariousness!

Unfortunately, I was faced with this "word" a lot at a certain occasion. It is a word that seems to be very attractive to guys and girls that consider themselves "gamers" or internet-people in general.

The problem is that this "word" is used in a way that I can't cope with anymore. Not only is it a reference to everything that is funny or may seem funny in a certain situation, but it also seems to be a universal filler or ending sequence to an utterance. "LOL" in its spoken form equals a full stop. like WTF??

It's not the fact that the person uttering a "lol" is showing his emotion by using the abbreviation. It's the fact that they normally DON'T laugh, but replace it by a "word" that does not show the notion of the emotion at all. By saying the "word" lol, you do not show happiness, humor or delight. at. all. Sometimes, they make a little cough-sound before they say "lol", which - at least that's what I think - is supposed to represent the joy of laughing. But it is as far from being an equivalent to laughing as is Madonna from being a good singer.

This is how "lol-ers" (seem to) feel when they say the "word" lol:

 

 And this is how they actually look and sound like:

Laughing is an important part of your personality which shows your humor, your way of thinking, how outgoing you are and what you're interested in. Replacing it by a "word" is like replacing a kiss with a note that says "this is a kiss." Well, this actually sounds kind of sweet now that I think about it, but you get what I mean, right? Right?

The abbreviation should only be used via the Internet or ironically. It means "laugh(ing) out loud" - so why not just do exactly that?!?

For the sake of Glob the Almighty: Stop lol-ing, guys!! Just laugh out loud! Or giggle! Or chuckle! Or whatever! JUST DO IT! SHOW YOUR EMOTION!

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And now the drinking game begins! :D Re-read this post and drink every time I consider 'lol' a "word" ;) Have fun!

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~music time~

Say Lou Lou - Julian

Janelle Monáe - Tightrope (Oliver Nelson Remix)

IYES - Glow (demo)

Awolnation - Sail (Nico Pusch Remix)

Snap! ft. Sagi Rei - Rhythm Is A Dancer (Gamper & Dadoni Remix)


Unfortunately, the new semester starts tomorrow. I can't even tell you how excited I am! ..Not.
But we can do this! Together we are strong! Whoooaaaah!!

Greetings
~Maximiwax'*

Wave #5: Mixtapes

Normally, when you listen to music more or less actively, you listen to several tracks one after the other, right? And of course every player has a shuffle function or you make a playlist with the songs that you want to be included in the string of tracks that fit your mood. And this is where mixtapes go into action! If you find a mixtape that consists of at least 70% of tracks that you like, you're good to go. Considering that a mixtape is usually 1 hour long, you save time by listening to the whole thing rather than picking out your favorites one by one if you want something different. So here are a few nice mixtapes that I really enjoy and I hope you do, too! :)

FlightFacilities - 37,000 ft Mixtape


DJ Phono - This Sweet Love Extended Mix 2012


Yes Yes Y'all (Joshua) - I Love You Mix 2012


Yes Yes Y'all - While You Were Sleeping (MIX)

(By the way: Check out Yes Yes Y'all for more tracks and really nice music videos!)

Let these mixtapes play in the background while you do your internet-stuff/learning/cuddling/drawing/chatting/whatever and let me know of other mixtapes that you like!

...and don't forget to like this blog on Facebook! ;) -> Click here!

Greetings
~Maximiwax'*